J Recovery Journal

31 Dec 08 - Countdown at home

2008-12-31T22:15:00.008+08:00

just 1hr 45 mins more to Yr2009..in 'compensation' of my rejection to join their pool game, i had a great dinner with N277 just now.. it's supposed to be 2-person (me and lilian) chill out affair but it kinda snowballed into a 15 pple gathering.. it's amazing how things can get organised in such short time (invitation was only opened last night) despite this 'no reservation' season!! what a

30 Dec 08 - Let's get married

2008-12-30T23:42:00.007+08:00

(did any of u realise it was 29 dec yesterday?? .. oh well, i suppose i 'graduated' so well that we easily 'overlooked' that date... *good job, J*)u know why counsellors dun really talk much?? cos it's really interesting to hear all the complaints and scoldings from the 'victim'.. i really enjoy listening to how and what people are saying when they are angry/upset.. (try it - it's really fun..but

29 Dec 08 - To Doraemon

2008-12-29T23:57:00.003+08:00

hi doraemon(gosh, this is really weird - writting a letter on my own blog!?!)offline from this blog, there have been some commotion lately.. so many people have been asking me who are you and i'm left without word to reply.. even my lovable cousin is jumping in now to join the 'fun'.. i know you mentioned it does not matter who you are.. but we would really like to know more of you.. at least as

28 Dec 08 - To my dearest cousin

2008-12-29T01:01:00.006+08:00

ok,i know it's freaking late to start a blog entry but.. i'm just in awe of what is happening..i just came back fr a very blessed sharing with my very young cousin (12yrs younger!).. i'm totally honoured to share her life.. into her world, her life situations. Seriously, it's just so amazing how God unfolds His plan to me! He never fails to amaze me with His great ways - His ways are indeed

28 Dec 08 - Twilight

2008-12-28T20:23:00.004+08:00

if all things happen for a reason..i thank Val for her strong recommendation to me to watch 'Twilight'.. knowing it's a love story,i actually tried to avoid it, i never know if it will remind me of him.. i know i'm out of him, but still.. i just want to be careful.. anyway, under her strong urge, i dragged a friend out for this show after her facial appointment (this is NOT a show i can watch

26 Dec 08 - Greatest Christmas celebration

2008-12-27T00:12:00.007+08:00

i miss N277!! just came back from greatest n most fun gift exchange gathering!! even any count-down celebration cant beat this!though we are in different cg now, we came together tonight like a family.. enjoying all the food prepared by our own members (no fast food ok? it's all hardwork and efforts!!) and celebrate birthdays, and the gifts exchange (it's always fun to see them guessing who is

25 Dec 08 - Christmas Day

2008-12-25T02:56:00.007+08:00

what a good Christmas should be - spending quality time with family and.. blogging??!1) i had such wonderful Christmas eve!Christmas drama was so simple and GREAT! they really surprised the congregation with the angels 'flew' down from behind to the stage! AWESOME story on how disappointing events can lead to the Great Event - Birth of Jesus Christ.. when the angels screwed up on the whole big

23 Dec 08 - Carolling with SCC200!

2008-12-23T21:45:00.004+08:00

This year is really a BLESSED Christmas for me!I'm supposed to go orchard to get a last-minute gift but the thought of the maddening last-mintue crowd really put me off.. hence i came home.. on my way from my bus-stop to my block, i met SCC200!! Katherine, Arnold, Louis and gang! they are on their way to home carolling and i'm 'dragged' into their visitation schedule!! in fact, my tongue agreed

23 Dec 08 - Who is the real J?

2008-12-23T09:05:00.006+08:00

how fateful.. after raising the reflection qn last night, someone msn me and planted a pondering seed in J..those who know J .. J is1) very kiddish, totally unlike her age..2) very quiet lady3) very talkative (as that someone said last night)Wow,, talk about faces J really have the extremes..ok i admit i'm a very PR person.. PR in a sense i'm usually one of the people in the group to 'warm up'

22 Dec 08 - Different faces to meet the different faces

2008-12-23T00:20:00.007+08:00

well, tonight dinner with my gers really loosen me up, esp after past weeks of 'heavy responsibilities'.. though i'm the eldest in the group,i'm also the 'childish' of all (in fact, i really doubt they remember i'm years older than them).. .. looking at them,i saw myself.. so professional, so prim and proper.. being with them, i just feel so at ease, so kiddish if i may put it.. dont get me wrong

21 Dec 08 - I'm going Youth Service!!

2008-12-21T11:07:00.008+08:00

My Father in Heaven is just SO AMAZING!!1)confession: i'm running rather low on budget with all the gifts exchange gatherings .. (i've indeed overspent on some gifts)just this morning, i was planning my budget and wondering how am i going to survive till my pay day (though it's just few days away).. by faith, i know God will forgive my poor expediture discipline; by faith i know God will provide

20 Dec 08 - Appointment of Authority

2008-12-21T01:01:00.004+08:00

people, let's not talk about 'earning respect' first..instead, let us acknowledge the fact that leaders are appointed by God.even your parents,ur elder siblings and ur boss are appointed by God to have authority over you. be it a good leadership or not,they ARE appointed by God. (who are you to challenge the Creator's appointment on His creations?)i believe everyone is learning in this life

20 Dec 08 - 春風她吻上我的臉,告訴我現在是春天

2008-12-20T11:37:00.003+08:00

have i ever told u how i love mornings?i love my weekend mornings with my parents.. 3 of us (my 2 sis usually wake up late) having breakfast at our nearby markets,then i will explore the wet markets with my mum (that's why my 2 naughty sis call me 'auntie').. i really like wet markets - more interpersonal, compared to supermarkets.. every stall knows everyone and it's always nice to follow my mum

19 Dec 08 - The older the guy, the less initiative he is

2008-12-20T00:09:00.002+08:00

i really had such exciting day today - last minute work requests,office Christmas celebration and helping out in another cg.. sometimes i just hope i can drive/ride a bike so i can get fr place to place faster.. office celebration was so happening and fun that some of us, who were supposed to leave early @ 7pm, actually ended up leaving at 8pm.. in the end i had to rush from office to the cg i've

18 Dec 08 - All things work for His Glory

2008-12-19T00:21:00.006+08:00

i know some of u want to read more of my 'inner feelings' / reflections instead of reading.. I LOVE JESUS!hey, this is my blog.. nothing wrong of proclaiming my love for my God here, right? at least, i dun start to preach 'sermon' here..i dun mind being fool for God..hope u r ready? here i go again - I LOVE JESUS!did u know what i just received?!? a sms fr my most doted young cousin!! her friend

17 Dec 08 - What a morning (again!)..

2008-12-17T15:13:00.003+08:00

Firstly I want to thank God that I've not been coughing since Monday, though I'm on fast :PThank God for strengthening my body!To be honest, I'm guilty of lazy evangelism. I know evangelism is essential part of the Great Commission, but.. maybe cos I've always feel inadequate in my Biblical theology or maybe cos I prefer 'building' role than to be 'casting nets'.. anyway, I've been praying for

16 Dec 08 - Stop probing, I've got my answer

2008-12-16T13:59:00.004+08:00

I shld have expected ‘trouble’ when I pose such a question, shldnt I?hey, people, don't speculate.. I’ll tell you when the time is ripe ok? Really, when and what have I kept anything from you?A good friend gave me this definition: “crush is when u see him/her, ya heart beat x2.... u will be longing to see him everytime.... not to get steady, but juz go enjoy his accompany.” Is it true? But I do

15 Dec 08 - God really 'speed things up'

2008-12-15T23:51:00.004+08:00

ok, i know it's late and i shldnt be up so late with my bad cough..but.. u know i always ve things to say after friend's wedding, right? morever,it's my BUDDY-ZW! The whole banquet was great, food is great n fresh too! I like Wendy's gowns.. very detailed and they really reflect her style. i'm so happy for ZW. We've known each other for 19yrs.. (man, that sounds OLD) he's like a half-brother to

15 Dec 08 - Having crush on someone?

2008-12-15T17:30:00.002+08:00

What is it like to have a crush on someone..That is such an old school question.. 'old' in a sense that the last time I used this phrase was way back in my secondary sch days.. That's old enough for me, ok?Definition of crush: (n) Informal an infatuationI guess it's like 'wanting to know more about this person' feeling? Maybe not to the extend that you'd desire to meet that person, but just want

14 Dec 08 - RCIA Genesis 08 Baptism Day

2008-12-14T23:03:00.004+08:00

14 Dec!! It's already 14 DEC!!I'm supposed to be baptised as Catholic at 2pm today! Yet i actually forgotten such an important day for my fellow catechumen! .. i only remembered it over dinner when i realised it's my buddy ZW's wedding tomorrow!! J, what is the matter with you these days? how can you forget such important dates?!?!i'm sorry, Vincent.. if u r reading this.. I've really forgotten

14 Dec 08 - Nick Vujicic

2008-12-14T12:10:00.005+08:00

what a morning.. i guess when He created me,He really made me to be a 'morning' person..it has been raining the whole morning that i cant go out with my mum to have our usual sunday breakfast.. sis's back from taiwan last night,now they are playing magjong with my mum.. to kill the boredom in this rainy morning..as for me, i just feel like checking my emails though i've checked it last night..

13 Dec 08 - BOLD and LOVING present

2008-12-13T23:16:00.007+08:00

Tonight is the 1st service W503 is attending as a new cell (we have more sisters than brothers!).. dunno why but just a feeling that i'll be 'more active' in this cell (training ground for greater things to come?).. gonna miss N277 even though it's kinda funny too, cos both cgs are all seated together during service and we only ve to split into respective cgs for debriefing after service.. i

12 Dec 08 - Dreadful Fridays..

2008-12-12T23:27:00.007+08:00

before i start.. i have to tell you: MY SISTER IS VERY BEAUTIFUL TONIGHT!! BRIGHTEST,ROUNDEST EVER! VERY VERY VERY BEAUTIFUL!!! (my bro david said it's the roundest in past 8yrs or 9yrs..i forgot :p )*****prayer request -i had a good discussion with my cellgroup leader last cg meeting.. i want to return serving in ministry.. i had enough rest when i was 'absent' from CHC.. as much as i wanted to

11 Dec 08 - Inefficient day

2008-12-11T17:44:00.003+08:00

After ending one of my tedious projects, I’ve to admit I’m slipping into festive mood now. So much so that I’ve been looking for things to buy, places to go and even movies to watch, instead of looking for more work tasks to do. (Trust me, I’ll ask for more work when I’m not so loaded.. we work as a team, have to help one another’s load, right?) So much so that it took me 30mins to finish a work

10 Dec 08 - Matt C.

2008-12-10T17:13:00.005+08:00

ok,people, my mind is so full today.. esp knowing there's a new reader in our midst. :) Welcome! (for a while, i was really bugged if i know him personally..)frankly, i'm really so 'available' at work today. For the whole morning, i had such fun chat with my Australia colleague.. nothing official, just social chat.. he's totally funny and bold in speech.. he even attempted to provoke another

9 Dec 08 - 想念L3B的日子

2008-12-09T22:24:00.006+08:00

菁很久沒用華文寫部落格了..菁今天提早回家, 8點半就到家了.. 小妹現在應該在花蓮遊玩, 二妹與媽去瑜伽課, 爸爸已經在房裡休息了.. 幫寶貝洗完澡,一個人看著TVBS新聞..似乎處在獨自在台灣的感覺..昨天才聯絡前同事聊到公司的情況, 今天就在電視上看到公司高層減薪的消息.. 昨天才得知前上司的近況,還答應他下次去台灣一定會去趟竹科找他們吃飯.. 公司近日有不少更動, 看來這次的經融危機真的不簡單.. 不知道菁的朋友們現在還好嗎.. 希望大家能'平安無事'地過年.. 相信如果上下一心, 菁相信再壞的日子都會過去的..好想念L3B的工作環境, 竹北的豪華偏僻宿舍..路加福音 1:37 因為，出於神的話，沒有一句不帶能力的。

9 Dec 08 - Welcome to my blog :)

2008-12-09T21:31:00.002+08:00

you who read my blog falls into 2 categories:1) you are of my inner circle of friends2) we have yet to meettoday i was totally freaked out! FREAKED OUT! Remember i shared abt a friend's blog few days ago and how tempted i was to leave comment in his blog? well, the truth is i left ONE comment. looking at his blogging history, i tot he wun be bothered by comments.. or he wun be checking his blog

9 Dec 08 - GREAT AWESOME BLESSED morning!

2008-12-09T10:03:00.006+08:00

I just had an most unusual morning!Let's start at the very beginning.. I woke up late, doing my usual rush to get ready for work.. when I finally settled down on my dad's ride to my busstop, my heart was filled with songs of praise! It didn't start as a rushing flood but..one song by one song, they all came to me as I opened my mouth to sing along my ride..(My dad must have heard and wondering

8 Dec 08 - Christ The King SSC200 Carolling

2008-12-08T21:23:00.003+08:00

it's been a cold (not just cool) day! just a short trip to AMK Hub, my limbs are freezing and my immune is dropping fast..back in my room now after a hot bath, .. sounds of carol from the window.. i know where's it from.. i cant deny how much i want to go out in my sleeping attire to join them.. i joined them last yr-- it's a night like this where i just rushed out of my house to follow these

8 Dec 08 - Courting for trouble..

2008-12-08T11:25:00.004+08:00

i know i'm courting for trouble..it's been a cool rainy morning.. so cool that i've lazed on bed for 2hrs before i get up, and even after i've done my morning laundry i'm willing to miss my-all-time-favourite-time: breakfast and be back to my bed.. (dun worry i'm not having any depression relaspe..just pure laziness)best of all, i went into my previous blog.. my Depression Dairy. ok, i didn't go

7 Dec 08 - 1st and LAST speed-dating

2008-12-08T01:03:00.008+08:00

i know it's late now but .. dunno why these few days i've the 'inspiration' to blog.. (fyi,if i dont ve the inspiration, i simply cant type beyond 1 sentence)what a day today..a farewell breakfast for my sis -> went to Standard Chartered Marathon to support my cell members (most of them are enthu marathoners) -> attended a speed-dating session (talked non-stop for 2hrs!! trust me i wun do it

6 Dec 08 - Where are your manners, guys?

2008-12-07T00:01:00.007+08:00

guys, i really cant help wondering.. where are your manners?i'm supposed to meet this grp of guy friends tonight.. though he asked me to join them tonight, but no exact details was given. OK, i understand guys dont plan in advance so I gave in and waited till the LAST MINUTE for their details.. (i have my own time and plan too, ya?) I gave him a buzz + 3 sms to follow up with the 'plan' but all

5 Dec 08 - Unhindered Prayers

2008-12-05T22:03:00.004+08:00

today a good friend sent me a very inspiring email.. just as i'm still pondering on my friend's marriage issue, this message seems to be meant for them..'Unhindered Prayers'Did you know that the way you treat people has an impact on the effectiveness of your prayers?The Bible says that the prayer of the righteous person is powerful (James 5:16), but if we aren’t treating others with honor,

4 Dec 08 - Interesting blog

2008-12-05T00:31:00.004+08:00

someone gave me his blog address today.. well, he blogs cos he dun like to repeat himself (so do I, but of course i've a better 'valid' reason than that).. of course, being the nosy me, i went to read his blog..he started blogging on Feb 4 (i still can remember how low in life i was on that day.. 2 days after my most depressing birthday).. but can i say his official first entry is on Feb 17 since

4 Dec 08 - Branded bags..

2008-12-04T10:16:00.004+08:00

Saw an email from a good friend this morning.. A prayer request for his wife who is obviously obsessed with some branded bags, and they are limited edition! That brings me back to one of my shopping trips.. These friends of mine went in and out of those classy boutiques like those rich 'Tai-Tai', and they compared which brand is more 'worthy' etc.. (If anyone dares to call me 'high-maintainence'

3 Dec 08 - Trust in relationship

2008-12-03T23:55:00.005+08:00

Good news to share! CellGroup N277 is MULTIPLYING! it's a joyous also a sad news to me. Joyous cos multiplication = more souls in the Kingdom of God, ie a growing church! Sad cos i've to 're-integrate' into the new cell.. nt that i dun like to reintegrate, but i'll be seeing less of some of my current cell members whom i'm very comfortable with now. well, that is CHC.. one cant be too comfortable

29 Nov 08 - What a GREATER Year - 2009!

2008-11-29T21:21:00.004+08:00

today's service is record-breaking! by 7.40pm, we're already in expo foyer 3, walking towards the car. as we decided to have a rest after the long last week, i'm already at home by 8.15pm! wow!.. first time :)Pst Tan's (super) short and simple message did it again (that's why we love his preaching so much! compact n powerful!) it's so short.. just 5 points on thanksgiving, yet the message is so

26 Nov 08 - 2nd involvement in BCP

2008-11-26T13:41:00.006+08:00

Yr2008 sure has all sorts of my 'first experience'..let alone what happened and had been overcame, past few days after Asia Conference were really totally new experience.. i was suffering from this food poisoning after eating fried koay-teow(with cockels).. together with my mum (who ate don't know what also ended up with stomach upset), we cuddled together on my bed (again!).. for the whole night

19 Nov 08 - Asia Conference Day1

2008-11-20T00:04:00.003+08:00

I've never met anyone as consistent as GOD!Just the day before, i was reminded of the vision given in 1995 - Church Without Walls. (That's why you guys get to listen to the song 'Making A Difference' when you visit my blog these days.Such a 'old' song full of memories with Sun as lead singer.. ) And behold - today's Asia Conference opening message is on the SAME topic - Making Difference in our

17 Nov 08 - 海角7號

2008-11-17T14:18:00.008+08:00

after 2 continual sleepless nights of cold i'm on medical leave today.. trust me - being on medical leave is really a boring thing for me.. decided to watch the most talked about Taiwanese movie - 海角7號 (Guoqing gave me a copy when he was in Singapore last month) .. finally i have the time to sit down and watch it..initially the plot was quite slow-paced.. but perhaps cos i really miss my 'life in

15 Nov 08 - God is Love

2008-11-16T00:54:00.002+08:00

today is my 1st time to an cath holy matrimony.. it's so nice to see all the amplify friends again, and cassilda (bride) is so GORGEOUS! i mean, leo n cass are so smart together.. just one look, u know they are made-in-heaven couple.personally i'm so blessed by Fr William's homily.. bringing me back to a verse i once harped on - let us love one another, for love comes from God..God is Love (1

13 Nov 08 - Friends in Taiwan

2008-11-13T23:42:00.006+08:00

it's now holiday seasons... so many people are planning their travel.. and most of them actually came to ask for my 'advice' to Taiwan, including my sister.. i'm glad i can provide some insights but .. honestly, i kinda miss 'my 2nd home'.. i know i've only been back for few months but how nice it wld be if i can just be ard my good friends (in taiwan), spending Christmas together.. just the

11 Nov 08 - Happy Birthday, Bosco

2008-11-11T22:24:00.002+08:00

tmr is 12Nov..just came to realise it when i log into facebook this afternoon.. at the right-hand corner, it says tmr birthday - bosco lai.. it's not as if i've forgotten his birthday (in fact it is one of those dates which i foresaw a challenge,just like 2Oct) but i really didn't realise its impact till this afternoon..as much as i wld like to celebrate with him,i know it's not in my range of

10 Nov 08 - Dumb way to know a person

2008-11-11T00:31:00.004+08:00

i received an email from Bosco today.. in fact it's abt 10am this morning when he sent to my webmail.. it took me 1min to decide if i shld open it, then i took 3mins staring at his message..before i embark on another 1min to decide if i should delete it. when i finally deleted it, i took more than 5mins for his 2 sentences email.basically, he was just replying to a mass survey email (those that

8 Oct 08 - God's reminder - 1John 4:4

2008-11-08T23:50:00.009+08:00

for the past 3 days, i've been receiving this verse from various people.. the verse i vividly remember as my first sharing in CTK charismatic prayer group during my pit (i was standing in front of everyone with the mic, proclaiming this verse which came from nowhere.. and that's also how i got to know uncle bonnie).. simple verse but it holds such power within.. now it's such a memorial promise

7 Nov 08 - Stones under polishing

2008-11-07T23:25:00.006+08:00

recently i've been thinking.. why do people complain about their work, colleagues, boss or even their friends? lunch time is a good time to mingle and share with colleagues, but also a good time to complain??ok, pouring out woes and sharing frustration is good and healthy but beware - there is a thin line between sharing and gossipping. personally, when the topic has gone beyond how you feel

6 Oct 08 - Faith is SIMPLE but requires regular EXERCISE

2008-11-06T23:40:00.008+08:00

believe it or not - i'm SO happy today! laughing from inside out.. my God is Living God - He hears and answers prayers!it started last night when i was praying for one colleague whose church commitment is not really that regular.. immediately after my prayer, she called! (this is the 1st time she's calling outside work-hours) and to my amazement, she actually requested my company to a mid-week

1 Nov 08 - Arise and Build 2008

2008-11-01T23:28:00.003+08:00

(looking at past entries, this journal is turning into a diary soon.. )this is the first time my A&B pledge is without sobbing and tears.. not cos this pledge does not mean much to me but perhaps i've learnt (still learning) to trust Him.. afterall He did miraculously help and see me thru my depression... If He had put the word in your heart, He WILL bring it to pass. that's one thing i know for

31 Oct 08 - Life is simple

2008-10-31T23:09:00.005+08:00

sitting on my super comfy bed,with a pot of hot tea in the stillness of night.. (despite the noise of magjong from my sis' room - my mum+YX+her) actually life is very simple.for my mum - a game of magjong is able to entertain her despite anxiousness on her long flight tomorrow.. for my sis n YX - card game (even simple gambling) or a song can make their day together..every chinese new year, all

30 Oct 08 - RCIA Christmas planning

2008-10-31T00:06:00.003+08:00

still thinking abt the love letters from RCIA.. they are really not making things easy for me to exit from this journey.. thru this yr, they have been my 'family' / cellgroup whom i look forward to meet, to interact with every Wed and Sun.. i know my decision is surprising n even disappointing to some of them, but they will always be my 'family'-in-Christ.. i know whenever i visit CTK, they are

29 Oct 08 - Touched by RCIA angels

2008-10-29T23:56:00.005+08:00

just now was my last class as catechumen, i was really shocked, REALLY surprised to hear my name and to receive the gift which they had prepared for me, though i was absent from the retreat.. i know the attendees had a towel each, cos Father Yim washed their feet for them.. but i.. i was not even there.. they actually had my smiling picture on a big envelope for me! it's just so nice!!blessed, i

27 Oct 08 - Camping @ NACLI

2008-10-27T22:03:00.004+08:00

i had a very interesting long weekend this wk.. well, it started with my anticipated boredom which gave me the 'drive' to involve in this activity alone.. i went SINGLES CAMP OUT @ NACLI! Well, i really miss NACLI training site.. had great memories there when i had my leadership camps there.. good old days with great fun.. So when i saw this activity to be held in NACLI, i'm so keen to register

26 Oct 08 - Awesome day!

2008-10-26T00:06:00.003+08:00

what a great day!1) i received a totally unexpected invitation to share another marriage joy!! and it's one of the friends in Amplify! cant tell you how much i miss Amplify (cos of commitment back in CHC ministry i've not been serving in Amplify).. i dont know if you remember Leonard whom i commented he's like 'little pastor'? well, it's his big day with Cassilda! I'm really so happy to receive

23 Oct 08 - 2nd Interview with Priest

2008-10-23T23:22:00.005+08:00

finally..i had my 2nd interview with Father Yim.. I was quite tongue-tied, till i let go of my rationale thinking.. expected his consensus with my decision, afterall baptism is not just another-thing-to-do.. it has a GREAT significance behind it, and this significance is for eternity!cant say i'm happy.. in fact i'm kinda sad but at the same time i'm at peace to have this settled.. if i'm meant

21 Oct 08 - Life of legacy for God

2008-10-21T10:11:00.005+08:00

Watching taiwanese news now opens my eyes to what Pastor Kong has been teaching - living a life of legacy for God. How a demise of a businessman has such impact on the whole community, that even the President came for his wake! This is what cultural mandate is about - bringing God into the marketplace!In my own opionion, Mr Wang Yung-ching 王永慶 (http://zh.wikipedia.org/wiki/%E7%8E%8B%E6%B0%B8%E6%

20 Oct 08 - Do Something With Nothing

2008-10-20T21:59:00.007+08:00

"Do Something with Nothing" .. what a good slogan usually used by those portable devices.. during our wait for bus or friend,we know how to keep ourselves occupied. but what about our long wait in life? or even long suffering?? are we able to be constructive in these waits???honestly,i have difficulty in this area cos i am impatient person. even waiting for a friend for 5mins is long enough.. my

19 Oct 08 - Forever friends..

2008-10-19T21:40:00.003+08:00

9.30pm.. taken my hot bath, drank my herbal cold remedy, trying to fight off the flu and prepare for tmr's work.. i'll be better.. since my victory over depression, i have not allowed myself to be away from work or any activities.. i know i cannot make exception tmr.wrote a reply to an old friend.. hopefully he'll understand and accept my decision. i know i've been nasty to him these days, but

18 Oct 08 - The list gets more defined

2008-10-19T01:13:00.005+08:00

why guys ard me like to hold themselves in such a 'i-know-all', 'i-can-handle','dont worry abt me' position to impress me?today i had a unexpected visit from an old friend.. not exactly unexpected, but his visit today was not made known to me. hence i was minding my own activities,when he suddenly turned up at my house. it's not that i dont welcome him,but this out-of-plan thing is quite a big

18 Oct 08 - Last Journey with ZW's mother

2008-10-18T12:49:00.006+08:00

Just came back from ZW's mum's funeral.. i cant say i'm close to her,but when i saw the grief.. how hard ZW and Wendy tried to fight their tears when they went thru the ritual.. my tears just cant help flooding my eyes.. if you think i'm emotional, well..my sister cried too..Going thru the ritual, my sister was surprised that i offered the incense. Not because i'm denying God's Word, but this is

15 Oct 08 - Sembawang

2008-10-15T22:53:00.008+08:00

i finally stepped onto sembawang soil.. the very place full of joyful memories with Bosco..now it's a painful place for me.. stepping out from mrt, i tried not to look around, in case i bump onto him (though i know wed is his cellgroup night in AMK). i was even so tempted to go to his usual bicycle parking place to 'see him'.. tried to walk chin up through Sun Plaza, and be as relaxed as i could.

14 Oct 08 - I'm glad I've prayed..

2008-10-15T12:01:00.003+08:00

What a lot to experience these days..Last sat, I was basking in joy over a blissful marriage. On Mon night, I felt the need to pray for my buddy's mother who has only days left. I was about to pay his family a visit after work today. Just about I was to leave office at 6pm, a simple sms brought such great grief - "My mon just passed away at 5pm."I can imagine how painful it is to send out this

11 Oct 08 - Love is unconditional commitment to an imperfect person

2008-10-11T23:11:00.007+08:00

Went for a ex-colleague's Holy Matrimony today..I must say it's the most heart-warming i've been. It's held in Care Harvest Centre (their church) and the Presence of God was so strong! I've been to serveral Holy Mat but this one is really so blessed!! Very often, on this special day, the focus is on the newly-wed but this time the focus is on God.. the whole blissfulness is so strong (i'm sure

10 Oct 08 - Proverbs 19:21

2008-10-10T13:16:00.009+08:00

God really works in ways we cannot fathom, or at least I cannot fathom..in the midst of all the financial crisis and job retrenchment news,despite knowing God has blessed me this job(once n again) n that i shld trust in Him (afterall i've been praying for His protection on my team n me),but i was still affected n started to worry.. all the negative thoughts came in..Then my colleague-Jenny came

10 Oct 08 - My 9mths of Catholic Experience

2008-10-09T23:30:00.009+08:00

i returned to CG N277 tonight,after 9mths of absence.. though i've to 'start to know everyone again',but i do not regret taking this 9mths of cross-over, esp when it seem to be 'bad-timing' then..honestly,i miss my depression days.. those were the days i seem to get revelations and visions so clear from the Lord when i seek Him.. but when all is well,it's strange that i find it more challenging

5 Oct 08 - How much time do I have left?

2008-10-05T19:13:00.003+08:00

what can i say? i was happy for my godbrother this morning when he shared his intention to move onto higher commitment in his relationship with his gf. though plans are still floating around as ideas, but i'm really happy for him.. to make this move requires much thinking n considerations from him, esp he was in a rather confused state when we last shared.. I know he thought it through.. i know

3 Oct 08 - I survived 2 Oct

2008-10-03T22:57:00.003+08:00

i merely passed the 'anniversary' test.. 2 Oct.. i still cried for him, well..about 5mins.. i still miss him when i closed my eyes to sleep last night.. at least i survived without slipping back into the state of 'why this happened'..by right, i shld be ok by now.. esp these days i've met some new friends, esp through Gwen's wedding.. i'm flattered and honoured that some actually indicated keen

1 Oct 08 - <又見一帘幽夢>第34集

2008-10-01T16:16:00.005+08:00

今天國定假日,也是陰涼的一天.. 在家休息懶懶地看電視節目,第一次看到這節目... 被打敗了,哭得很狼狽.. 戲裡感情情節是多麼直接地觸摸菁的深心處.. 愛情的執著,偉大,犧牲,愛護,背叛和傷痛..菁都深深地感覺到.. 雖然是第一次看這連戲劇,不知道為甚麼卻能這麼生感其中..云帆對妻子的體貼,細心和愛護真的令人羨慕.. 他那份對愛的信任,守護承諾的誠心真的還會有這類男生存在嗎? 沈默穩重的個性帶有十分待人處事的體貼細心愛護.. 當妻子面對親姊姊苛薄尖酸的言語掃射時,可以體會他心裡有多痛..多無奈,多自責.. 看著愛人被傷害,卻知道這是必須的過程,所以無法保護她.. 愛妻強忍眼淚的畫面是多麼心如刀割的痛.. 菁的眼淚也開始因為這份深愛而漸漸落下..姊姊是多麼怨恨自己丈夫.. 但谁又了解在她苛薄言語的背後是遍體淋傷的心靈.. 被深愛的人背叛兩人曾許下的諾言真的是非常非常痛心的一件事,

29 Sep 08 - 溫馨的喜事

2008-09-29T16:01:00.003+08:00

昨晚是好同事結婚過門的好日子..作為姐妹團的一份子,菁一早就起床..也因為新娘娘家離菁家有段距離,所以也不得不早起....好想賴床..最後還是匆匆忙忙地上了計程車..出門前還被媽媽念了一遍'又當姊妹了小心嫁不出去'..這是菁第6次當新娘的姊妹吧..姊妹當然不能白拿紅包不做事..已經和其他姊妹計畫好重重考驗來測試新郎娶新娘的誠心.. 雖然前幾次的新郎們都很互動但這次的兄弟們真的是為了新郎犧牲許多.. 也許是因為他們兄弟情深,也許因為他們可憐新郎前晚食物中毒還在復原中.. 就連帶病上徵的新郎也玩得很開心.. 迎娶遊戲好玩熱鬧多了.. 也或許因為上星期姐妹團已經認識那班兄弟所以當大家玩在一起還真的誤了吉時.. 一整天的迎娶和敬茶的程序很累人,但能分享好朋友的喜悅是多麼快樂的事..晚上的婚宴簡單卻熱鬧極了.. 節目不匆忙,時間不緊湊.. 好舒服的婚宴.. 新婚夫婦一桌桌地拍完照後,

27 Sep 08 - Arise n Build is here again!

2008-09-27T22:32:00.004+08:00

God really has His plan n timing.. for past 13yrs,no matter how 'lost touch' i was from CHC..God never fails to pull me back into this big project as a church. though it can be really challenging,but i'm really happy to be called back to be in this project..'Arise and Build' is not about the numbers to give. it's really about the transformation of life and mindset in this period. Stewardship,

21 Sep 08 - Sound of Music 真善美

2008-09-21T15:00:00.006+08:00

天啊,菁真的覺得自己似乎踏入中年...今天原本約幾個同事來我家學麻將但她們臨時有事取消了..全家甚至爸媽已出去約會,留菁一個人在家裡.. 菁一向認為自己不適合獨自待在家裡, 但今天不想一個人逛街,即使出去也不知道能做些什麼.. 所以菁決定上網看戲..一部愛情片..真的無聊到不行所以放棄了.. 這就是一個人的生活嗎? 真的還真可怕.. 這是'老處女'的前湊嗎? 菁也想出門社交,甚至想過參加什麼什麼活動去認識更多朋友 (好聽點是'朋友'但實際上大家還不是在評估彼此可否成為伴侶) 但菁相信上天的微妙安排 - 會來的總會來,菁也不想做些自己不喜歡的事..則來之則安之吧..但單身女的心情又有谁人知? 在真的要無聊發狂前的最後一分鐘,突然想看<真善美>.. 菁非常喜歡這部老片,百看不厭..甚至不用歌詞菁已經把戲裡所有的歌背在腦海了.. 邊看邊唱讓菁覺得其實自己也不是這麼'沒人要'嘛..就像女主角,

20 Sep 08 - Smart Alec J

2008-09-20T01:04:00.004+08:00

somehow i should be asleep by now.. somehow i should not be testing myself.. but i did. (good job, J, really) .. went to facebook.. saw his updated status - "in relationship".. cant deny that i'm affected.. but i know God's ways are higher than my ways.. if he's for me,He'll make a way.. if he's not,at least he's happy and i've learnt to be closer to God's love through it all.. what is to come

19 Sep 08 - 2nd prize won!

2008-09-19T11:04:00.004+08:00

I cannot - I CANNOT express how blessed and happy I am now!!!For you who do not know,I was thinking of getting an Apple iPod touch for all my videos and mp3. Then I got this really great deal on my new phone, so I got myself this new mobile. And now, my Walldorf office congratulates me for winning the second prize - Apple iPod touch! I'm totally totally surprised and blessed!!!! I thank God for

18 Sep 08 - Another beam of light

2008-09-18T23:44:00.003+08:00

did i ever mentioned that i have this friend who always know when i am in need or troubled without anyone telling her anything? we have not known for long, hardly have chance to talk, let alone calling or even sms.. but somehow she'll receive the 'vibes' when i need someone or some advice.. I know it's spooky, but it's true. my extraordinary friend from AMP.. while i'm still discerning n seeking,

17 Sep 08 - 可風與建和

2008-09-17T17:37:00.001+08:00

今天真奇怪.. 突然想念在前公司的同事,那些下班後一起K歌的日子..可風和建和的歌聲,他們的合唱的默契.. 真是耍寶.. 想起來就想笑,好懷念.. 這首歌就這樣飄進菁的腦海.. 說得真貼切..菁和他也許就像是”海鸟跟鱼相爱, 只是一场意外” 更奇妙的是他也就如歌詞” 你用唇语说你要离开””转身离开””分手说不出来”..也許当初彼此的確不够成熟坦白, 所以釀成今日的热情不再笑容勉强不来.. .. 只是一切结束太快了.. 珊瑚海 (Jay & Lara)海平面远方开始阴霾悲伤要怎么平静纯白我的脸上始终挟带一抹浅浅的无奈你用唇语说你要离开（心不在）那难过无声慢了下来汹涌潮水你听明白不是浪而是泪海转身离开（你有话说不出来）分手说不出来海鸟跟鱼相爱只是一场意外我们的爱（给的爱）差异一直存在（回不来）风中尘埃（等待）竟累积成伤害转身离开（分手说不出来）

15 Sep 08 - 辛樂克颱風 Sinlaku Typhoon

2008-09-15T18:01:00.009+08:00

今天休病假終於可以躺在沙發看電視節目.. 可是..眼前的一切是多麼心寒..菁一向喜歡颱風暴雨的力量,喜歡其中的威力..但辛樂克颱風讓她有些改觀..颱風的破壞力也真的是太大了.. 也許是人為的疏忽,也許是上天的安排.. 天災釀成意外,意外使許多無辜民眾付出寶貴的生命..中秋佳節原本應該是家人團圓的一天..因為颱風帶大雨來襲,溪水衝襲使大橋斷毀, 這樣的链式反应就已經奪走幾個寶貴的生命.. 菁試想如果自己在那些大橋行駛時被奪走生命,或因為橋斷而不能逃離危險.. 在家裡等待菁回家團圓吃飯的爸媽會是多麼心碎擔心.. 看著罹難者家屬的哭啼,菁也不禁落淚.. 一個人的死活不只是他自己的責任也是家人的牽掛....妹妹原本計畫去台灣旅遊,泡溫泉.. 想到這裡,菁毛孔悚然... 祈禱保佑千萬不能讓不幸的事發生在家人身上.. 菁真的會瘋的..

13 Sep 08 - New signs in Mid-Autumn

2008-09-15T08:55:00.008+08:00

A lot of things n questions in my mind for past days.. 1) being Christian,we always pray for His Will be Done (ie. the Lord's prayer)..but how do i know what is His will? I guess that's the question which many of us face in our decision-making.. I have been put to make a tough decision lately.. decision to Salvation is easy but it's the commitment to be planted that is really troubling me,cos the

11 Sep 08 - Chrysalis

2008-09-12T16:44:00.008+08:00

I really like this old story.. though it's old,but the truth it holds endures forever..sometimes our intentions are good,but if it's not the Will of God, it'll actually make the situation worse... every struggle has its purpose.. Nothing happens unless God allows it - He has His reason.CHRYSALISA man found a cocoon of a butterfly. One day a small opening appeared. He sat and watched the butterfly

10 Sept 08 - 還好沒翹課

2008-09-11T00:10:00.006+08:00

09092008 長長久久的這一天菁把手機與聯絡號碼換了.. 這應該是菁今年最後一次的大消費,因為單身的菁其實也沒什麼可消費的. 雖然現有的手機還能使用,但是他名下的電話線..雖然他也沒連絡菁取回電話費用,但菁知道應該了結.何況菁很喜歡這台PDA手機..帥呆了!今天菁故意翹RCIA課..雖然明知不應該卻80%的心情的確不想去..甚至故意約朋友要幫她計畫她的婚禮,但在菁下班前的最後一分鐘朋友盡然發生狀況,所以改為下星期約會.. 菁又故意聯絡班上最不可能出席的同學 - 心想有伴一起翹課,心理上至少會過得去.. 萬萬想不到,今天這位同學不只不想曠課,盡然還鼓勵菁出席課堂.. 事情就是這樣安排好了..菁也只好乖乖上課去..但菁沒有後悔不翹課.. 菁不只在神的殿裡好好休息了,今晚的課題像是溫柔的指導著菁.. 天主就是這樣喜歡用祂自己的安排,往往在菁失落叛逆時輕輕地菁的視線引導回正路,並給予安慰平安

7 Sep 08 - Another meaning to my TP T-shirt

2008-09-07T22:23:00.007+08:00

I happened to see my TP orientation T-shirt in my wardrobe..was kinda affected...cos this is the shirt which he'd wear when he stayed over at my house.. my heart ached at this thought.. Then, i received this video invitation in facebook.. I CANNOT believe it!! Totally amazing!! TOTALL AMAZING!!I cannot, i mean it- I really CANNOT stop laughing!! We really had such great fun as TP Orientation

6 Sep 08 - 沙灘上的海星

2008-09-06T22:18:00.007+08:00

窗外下著大雨,涼涼冷冷的..好舒服..加上一壺熱玫瑰茶在床邊是多麼享受的夜晚..今天陳牧師分享了一個簡單的道理..A father n son are strolling on a beach.The son is picking up the erroded pieces of seashells along the beach.Suddenly,they saw something floating on the water.When the thing is washed up nearer to shore,they realise it's a beautiful starfish.The son wades eagerly forward to pick it,but when he is close to it,he hesitates and returns to his

5 Sep 08 - New Beginnings Concert

2008-09-05T23:57:00.004+08:00

just came back from an orchestral concert titled "New Beginnings".. i thought i'd enjoy it cos i have always enjoyed such events but it didn't turn out as enjoyable as i thought i would.. he kept coming to my mind - he was in a orchestral band as flute player n we enjoyed attending concerts together.. (speaking of being athletic n talented,he is -at least in my eyes) i miss him.. it seems like

3 Sep 08 - Day 1 in Reality

2008-09-03T23:17:00.003+08:00

can i say today is my first day back in reality? for past days,i was still in transit between getting over n moving forward. but today i resumed my weekly routine - back to RCIA Wed class, back to be with people after work.. (of course i work with people at work,but that's work..but after work,i'll stay home n enjoy my transit state of mind)lesson today is on value of life in this modern world..

2 Sep 08 - Addicted to Internet radio

2008-09-02T16:23:00.009+08:00

I really love this Chinese internet radio station - www2.cvc.tv/go/sheng/In fact I'm so addicted to it that i find myself looking forward to afternoon every day, just to tune into 缤纷生活(Wonderful Life) programme host by 大为. I don't know why but whenever i listen to this program..my whole being-body and soul will be so still and attentive.. all i want is to listen, absorb and learn from this

30 Aug 08 - 一個人逛街

2008-08-30T23:11:00.003+08:00

今天菁一個人逛街..這是她這一年第一次一個人出門逛街.. 菁曾經很享受一個人逛街的樂趣,但因為害怕在街上碰到或想起他,菁已經有8個月一直不敢一個人逛街.. 愛人的代價真的很大..菁今天也回"家" 了..感覺上好像有幾年沒回城市豐收教會,但實際上才不過幾個星期..在這裡,不管心情再怎麼差,菁可以將一切的一切較妥出來..把身上的包袱卸下..好輕鬆..看見小組成員們,心裡是多麼安撫..似乎回到家的感覺..雖然他們不了解菁的掙扎,但他們還是菁親愛的兄弟姊妹..尤其是Valerie,Delia和Jocelyn.. 大家很高興看見菁回來,但他們不會知道菁在這幾個月也是多麼想念他們..今天的啟示是"一切相信"馬可福音 9:23耶穌對他說：你若能信，在信的人，凡事都能。Mark 9:23Everything is possible for him who believes.羅馬書 1:17義人必因信得生

29 Aug 08 - 回家後的第一杯小酒

2008-08-29T17:18:00.009+08:00

很久沒有休閒地在家裡陪爸爸喝小酒一杯..好久沒有這麼舒服地與爸媽聊天..原來陪他們看台灣連續劇也可以是多麼休閒.. 呵呵(雖然不了解台灣連續劇怎麼可以作到500多集!!不可思議的長編) 似乎好像回到台灣看電視的感覺..不能否認今天的菁一直想念著他.. 但又怎樣呢? 他也不會想菁... 菁也只能把這份思念放在風裡,讓她帶去吧..能帶走多少就多少..菁相信自己能過這一關..當上蒼關閉一扇門,同時也會展開另一扇門..雖然知道這扇門很難關,但為了開另一扇門,不管多難這門還是得關,不是嗎? 請為菁禱告吧..剛剛回來的菁就開始覺得累了..應該是這樣的新開始嗎?

28 Aug 08 - Just a normal female

2008-08-28T21:42:00.006+08:00

a friend reminded me that i still have another blog space.. i saw a photo with him there..our 1st Chinese New Year together..photos now serve as memories that my love was alive with me.. i've not forgotten him,despite of what he's done.. i still miss him,love him...yet i know the one i love is no longer alive.. it hurts, yes it hurts.. but what can i do? like what the song says - tell Him all of

告诉他

2008-08-28T19:57:00.014+08:00

菁在n年前就很喜歡這首歌..當時的菁也是到台灣休息..這首歌真的真的唱出了菁當時與現在的心聲最近更是希望能朋友們分享..告诉他吧..告诉他 - 何耀珊词：李宗盛曲：黄韵仁我让自己惊讶那么傻面对人生变化真的快乐在哪儿都问啦总是没有解答当我遭遇困难关卡孤身在天涯每当我心里有话就告诉他告诉他所有担心害怕所有忧虑牵挂我相信他一定有方法就告诉他告诉他所以困惑挣扎所有渴望缺乏交给他他是温柔光亮的灯塔

Sun with Love

2008-08-27T17:08:00.002+08:00

for no reason,i feel like listening to some Chinese songs..for no reason,i turned on internet radio and this song floats right into my heart..as if it's been waiting for me to listen.. 如果渴望的幸福仍然不明顯　我會帶著微笑繼續走向前恐懼在黑暗之中蔓延　因為我們看不見淚水從失去之中湧現　因為心已有殘缺我一直認真的去學　學如何用愛去解　心裡的結希望在陽光之中發現　因為我們看的見笑容從感謝之中呈現　因為心被愛充填我一直期待著明天　總會在黑夜的終點　出現在窗前I can see the sun.　I can see the sun with love.我祈禱每一個今天　都有一個夢想實現I can see the

25 Aug 08 - Potential candidates

2008-08-25T12:01:00.006+08:00

As my new journey starts,i have been receiving all sorts of funny 'considerations'.. some even started negotiating with me on the life after marriage..how ridiculous..I know they're teasing me n i really hope they don't mean it..if u ask me do i want to start my own family,of course i do! that's every girl's dream, i think. Esp after spending time with kids (including Princess婷婷), i'd really hope

24 Aug 08 - New Life

2008-08-25T00:11:00.003+08:00

someone asked me how's my retreat so far.. All i can say is God is good. though it's a personal emotional retreat,but He never fails to comfort and speak to me. He knows His plans for me. Even though i have a lot of helpful n loving friends around me in this foreign land but it is Him whom i find my peace and joy. you cant imagine all the meals and catching-ups i had to arrange for past days.

24 Aug 08 - Andre Dieu

2008-08-24T00:45:00.006+08:00

Introduced to this great volinist by my friend.. Totally inspired me to continue my guitar practice after casting the poor wooden frame aside for so long..music is such a beautiful universal language.. i really miss those days of Symphony days.. where i really enjoy being myself, immersed in this music which i cant play..(though i'm not musically inclined, but i really like the smoothness of the

17 Aug 08 - 菁的綽號 "Miss Typhoon"

2008-08-17T19:08:00.006+08:00

菁應該很受上天的恩寵吧.. 十多年來,每次菁去台灣,台灣都會遭颱風來襲而且多數都不是微風..也許是上天知道菁很喜歡強風大雨,所以"特別安排"吧..可是話說回來,菁真的不好意識..因為這些強風,菁的朋友們無法出外遊玩反而得加班救難..朋友,對不起..希望這次的氣流不會影響行程..when worse comes to worst,至少加班回家後,我們可以留在房裡談天嘛..反正菁只想休息,留在房裡也無所謂啦..不要排擠菁嘛 :p今天,不知道為甚麼,菁不禁哼起了那首歌..曾經陌生的人成了心中的你,歲月的奇妙,讓兩個人的世界有了奇蹟,已不再孤單的生命,讓我們用愛一起同行.. 真的是很好聽的一首歌但也是刺痛菁的一首歌.. 歌在人去..是多麼傷感的一件事..

16 Aug 08 - Taking a rest

2008-08-16T21:42:00.005+08:00

Janet has been keeping to herself past days.. She just wants to close the chapter,leave the past as it is and move on.. Let God be her Guide n Judge..Janet thought a lot today..She realised she IS enjoying her singlehood,being alive more than she thought. 雖然她還是會想起他,但已經不痛了,心中也沒有掙扎了.. 讓她想起她與死神擦肩而過的那一次..在手術桌上,連醫生也承認差點因內出血失去的菁竟然活了過來..經過那次離奇的經驗,菁學會了活著的快樂..活著比死亡真的好多了..今天的菁再次感到活著的快樂..失去他又怎麼樣..菁因為愛而沒死,

啟程

2008-08-15T16:49:00.004+08:00

菁在台灣WINCAMP第一次聽到這首歌(菁是不聽華語歌的)..深深地感動菁..一直如此地感動..也很適合菁現在的心情吧..作詞：陳淑秋作曲：伍思凱每一天都有一些事情將會發生每段路都有即將要來的旅程每顆心都有值得期待的成分每個人都有愛上另一個人的可能想愛就不能害怕會有傷痕沒有人完整卻有人能信任才找到永恆想到達明天現在就要啟程只有你能帶我走向未來的旅程想到達明天現在就要啟程你能讓我看見黑夜過去天開始明亮的過程每一天都有一些事情將會發生每段路都有即將要來的旅程每顆心都有值得期待的成分每個人都有愛上另一個人的可能想愛就不能害怕會有傷痕沒有人完整卻有人能信任才找到永恆想到達明天現在就要啟程只有你能帶我走向未來的旅程想到達明天現在就要啟程你能讓我看見黑夜過去想到達明天現在就要啟程只有你能帶我走向未來的旅程想到達明天現在就要啟程你能讓我看見

13 Aug 08 - 第二課 : Walk on Water

2008-08-13T10:14:00.003+08:00

馬太福音 14: 23- 33散了眾人以後，他就獨自上山去禱告。到了晚上，只有他一人在那裡。那時船在海中，因風不順，被浪搖撼。夜裡四更天，耶穌在海面上走，往門徒那裡去。門徒看見他在海面上走，就驚慌了，說：是個鬼怪！便害怕，喊叫起來。耶穌連忙對他們說：你們放心！是我，不要怕！彼得說：主，如果是你，請叫我從水面上走到你那裡去。耶穌說：你來罷。彼得就從船上下去，在水面上走，要到耶穌那裡去；只因見風甚大，就害怕，將要

12 Aug 08 - Sunflower for New Start

2008-08-12T23:26:00.004+08:00

菁覺得自己很幸福..因為身邊有許多很好很關心她的朋友..今天,那個人終於出面做了他的解釋,等了8個月的結局..讓菁感到好笑的是他的解釋'他的認錯是多麼的編編有理..似乎他也是個受害者..真可笑,可悲...菁好想與他對質,但也知道這只是無聊的爭執..何必呢...人變心,什麼理由都是對的..讓他去吧..不要再與他糾纏下去了..夠了周圍的朋友都為菁難過,就連公司的同事也快氣爆了..菁真的很感激大家的愛護,尤其是菁的3位好姊妹(Jen,Cheryl,Ya)..原本她們約定今晚吃飯,慶祝Ya的生日..但是她們在下班前的幾分鐘得知那個人的回應,她們還是抽時間讀了那個長而無謂的回覆..當菁遲到又連絡不上時,她們關心的簡訊與多通未接電話簡介地表達他們對菁的一種關懷..菁真的很感激與高興有這麼關心她的朋友,真的很感激..在車站等待45分鐘的Jen為了菁準備了好大一束向日葵..Jen

11 Aug 08 - 第一課: Do not miss any opportunity

2008-08-11T23:00:00.006+08:00

能說是奇蹟嗎? 菁今天的開始是多麼的低潮,但現在的她是多麼快樂的..真的是快樂的..今天,菁以自己的信念和堅持把自己僅有的歡樂帶給周召的人.. 內心掙扎的她能以輕鬆的談話逗同事們笑..甚至還能把鼓勵傳給遠在印度的同事..因為她相信每個人'每一件事都應該得到鼓勵與讚賞,不管結果是好是壞,至少大家都在崗位上付出..大家一起為團隊奉獻菁學會了事事都有感恩的機會. 雖然自己的狀況不是很好,但並不表示周圍的人也不好.. 反而人在掙扎中作的決定,威力是多麼的大.. 在痛苦中幫助別人其實是給自己巨大的快樂神經:以弗所書 5章 15-16節你們要謹慎行事、不要像愚昧人、當像智慧人．要愛惜光陰、因為現今的世代邪惡。Act like people with good sense and not like fools. These are evil times, so make every minute

11 Aug 08 - 新的第一天

2008-08-11T09:23:00.003+08:00

還沒睜開眼，心就痛。。真的不想起床。。臥在被窩裏，菁真的不想面對任何人。。（憂鬱症的明顯徵兆）但她知道這是一個過程，不管多累日子還是得過，還是不能讓家人擔心，尤其是媽媽。。媽媽在菁得憂鬱症的前兩個月為了安撫菁的情緒，委屈自己地與菁睡在菁的小小單人床。。雖然媽媽自己心裡也心疼,很不舒服但她還是陪菁度過難過的打擊。。菁不能再讓媽媽擔心了。。菁終於鼓起勇氣起床，面對心碎的一天。。在上班的途中，菁渴望神賜的安慰，力量與平安。。為了不讓自己有逃避的機會，她要求爸爸載她去搭車，雖然那只是短短的距離。。為了不讓自己有逃避的機會，菁把所有的精神鎖定在閱讀，全程閱讀著‘敬畏神，接近神’。。她不斷地祈禱神的力量，勇氣和喜悅。。她緊緊地依靠著神，惟有神知道她心中的掙扎和那十分難過的傷痛。。面對人群，菁是微笑的；面對天父，菁是多麼的悲傷無助。。菁知道慈愛的天父會安撫她的痛，為她作主，一切的一切在天王的安排中。。

10 Aug 08 - 新的開始嗎?

2008-08-10T22:51:00.003+08:00

幾個小時前的菁還是流著眼淚..心碎悲傷極點..好想找個人訴苦痛哭..因為她愛的人變了..徹徹底底傷透了她的心..(男生變心真的是不留情,曾經的甜蜜是今日的傷口)..好痛好痛..想哭卻流不出眼淚的痛..菁感謝天主賜她力量與勇氣,她才沒有再次陷進憂鬱症..雖然心碎但菁知道在世界的另一端有一個人疼惜著她--慶好久沒和慶聯絡了..掙扎了很久才決定聯絡慶..他的聲音如昔日的親切關心..忍不住,菁哭了..她不能在家人面前哭..但聽到慶的聲音,菁一邊述說她的故事一邊流下眼淚..菁了解她應該想望和期待新的未來,但她真的怕了..愛一個人的代價是無比的悲傷心痛..她卻還很愛著他..電話另一端的聲音是她的精神支柱..菁真的沒有力氣去面對愛情考驗..慶的每一句安慰像是溫柔的手輕輕地安撫著菁..雖然兩人的距離千里,但能感受到那份疼惜的愛.. 慶總有辦法逗菁笑..菁好久沒這麼開心地笑了..連自己聽了都很心寒..