just 1hr 45 mins more to Yr2009..
in 'compensation' of my rejection to join their pool game, i had a great dinner with N277 just now.. it's supposed to be 2-person (me and lilian) chill out affair but it kinda snowballed into a 15 pple gathering.. it's amazing how things can get organised in such short time (invitation was only opened last night) despite this 'no reservation' season!! what a highly efficient group! I brought my cousin along and i'm so glad she's open to 'be with Christians'.. (I dunno why but pple always have this impression that when Christians gather, they either pray, study the Bible or preach.. which is NOT totally true! we are still normal people require normal social activities!!)
though i may be deem as anti-social to turn down all the celebration outings, but i'd rather stay at home with my mum who is alone at home (my 2 sis are celebrating outside with their friends n bfs; my dad's working).. i'm happy to be at home now with my family and perhaps cos i know it'll be so hard to return home after countdown.. been there done that, and i dun think i have the energy to dance the night away again... perhaps age is really catching up??
marina bay countdown is so much more energetic than vivocity :) (btw, tay ping hui's voice is quite nice).. wondering what are my friends doing out there, while waiting for countdown.. though i miss the hipe and energy, but unless i'm prepared to dance the party till next morning... lest no point squeezing with the crowd. perhaps i will try that again next yr?? ahahaa
taiwan's countdown party is nice (though i dunno what they are singing :P) .. but it sure reminds me of my 'hometown' ahaha.. miss those ktv days though i really dunno who and what they are singing.. ahhaa.. great fun when you just dunno + dun care.. making a fool of myself. hahaa
all in all, i'm so happy to spend the last day of 2008 with my love ones - N277 and my cousin :) and now.. my mum :) It will be a GREATER year ahead! I'm so looking forward to 2009!
Psa 46:10
Be still, and know that I am God
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
30 Dec 08 - Let's get married
(did any of u realise it was 29 dec yesterday?? .. oh well, i suppose i 'graduated' so well that we easily 'overlooked' that date... *good job, J*)
u know why counsellors dun really talk much?? cos it's really interesting to hear all the complaints and scoldings from the 'victim'.. i really enjoy listening to how and what people are saying when they are angry/upset.. (try it - it's really fun..but just dun join in their fun!) many a times, people rehearse and repeat those angry and hurtful words and images to themselves.. (this is where fun is - so silly of people)
seen the movie "monster-in-law"? or heard of how impossble tough in-laws relationship can be? well.. i'm speaking to the guys tonight.. guys, pull down your ego and take on your humility when u face your in-laws or potential in-laws..
1) acknowledge the fact they ARE parents of your wife/gf
i dun care if ur partner is fostered or they are not 'good' parents.. the real fact is THEY ARE YOUR ELDERS. they might not be 'open-minded' as you or even your parents, but they are your elders, her parents. remember we talked abt submission to authority, and every authority on earth is appointed by God? So, stop finding excuses for yourself that "respect is to be earned".. even if respect is to be earned, who are you to ask your elders to earn your respect? how much of life have you been through, compared to them?
2) love is an involvement of 2 families
i know it sounds like "romeo and juliet" but it's very true.. love is about giving sacrificially. if u really love your partner, you want her to be happy, dont you? it's clear that being sandwiched is not a joy.. but even if your partner 'resents' her own parents, do you think she'll be happy cos she's 'out of their clutches'? no one likes a broken relationship, esp with own parents. by 'helping her out of the clutches', you are not restoring joy in her heart (in fact you cant!) And pls dun join the vicious cycle of blaming her parents or siding with ur partner for the sake that she is your partner.
guys, you have an important role in every relationship, esp in a family. you are called to LEAD, not to be led! you have a choice - lead her into fullness of joy or - lead her into the whirlpool of hurt
even though you really do not like her parents or family, humble yourself to earn their respect and trust. the process is full of trials and even tedious.. but it stems down to how much you want your partner to be in REAL JOY, to be free from all the bondages of hurt and resentment..
Remember - what goes around comes around.. one day when ur daughter has a bf, do you want him to earn your repect or you earning his?
3) marriage is a 1-time life-long commitment
those who are married will tell you: it's easier to say 'I do' than to stay married. how true, isn't it? many people are willing to spend 1 yr to plan their big day, but takes 1 day to end it off.
for those guys who are not married - how do you know she is 'the one'?
i know there's no such thing as 'the one' cos pple do change, so do your expectations.. but how can u be sure she is the one who will get you away from all other temptations? 10yrs, 20yrs down the road, will you be able to 'resist' outside seductions becos of her?
dun be eager to marry cos u r of the 'right age' (if so, you are obviously not in the right mentality for marriage) or simply cos u 'feel comfortable' with her. of course, i'm nt asking u not to get married. but do give SERIOUS consideration of the commitment behind the word "marriage". You may 'feel right abt it' now, but how abt feeling right 20yrs,30yrs to come?
then again, do not shun from this responsibility of marriage. You are created with a stronger shoulder to take these responsibilities! (to be crude: why do you think God bless male to be stronger than female? it comes with responsibilities to bear!)
Again, i must remind you - marriage is NOT a try-out. you CANNOT just 'try and see how things will turn out'!! be it Christian values or whatsoever.. do you not know broken marriage is a deep stab into the heart, though people may appear ok with it? Is this the happiness you promise to give in your marriage vow?
.. think about it.. be seriously serious when you say 'let's get married'
p/s: dont worry i'm not recalling my hurt cos it's 'annivesary'.. but cos i've just counselled a friend on this issue.. dont freak out! I'm really ok!!
u know why counsellors dun really talk much?? cos it's really interesting to hear all the complaints and scoldings from the 'victim'.. i really enjoy listening to how and what people are saying when they are angry/upset.. (try it - it's really fun..but just dun join in their fun!) many a times, people rehearse and repeat those angry and hurtful words and images to themselves.. (this is where fun is - so silly of people)
seen the movie "monster-in-law"? or heard of how impossble tough in-laws relationship can be? well.. i'm speaking to the guys tonight.. guys, pull down your ego and take on your humility when u face your in-laws or potential in-laws..
1) acknowledge the fact they ARE parents of your wife/gf
i dun care if ur partner is fostered or they are not 'good' parents.. the real fact is THEY ARE YOUR ELDERS. they might not be 'open-minded' as you or even your parents, but they are your elders, her parents. remember we talked abt submission to authority, and every authority on earth is appointed by God? So, stop finding excuses for yourself that "respect is to be earned".. even if respect is to be earned, who are you to ask your elders to earn your respect? how much of life have you been through, compared to them?
2) love is an involvement of 2 families
i know it sounds like "romeo and juliet" but it's very true.. love is about giving sacrificially. if u really love your partner, you want her to be happy, dont you? it's clear that being sandwiched is not a joy.. but even if your partner 'resents' her own parents, do you think she'll be happy cos she's 'out of their clutches'? no one likes a broken relationship, esp with own parents. by 'helping her out of the clutches', you are not restoring joy in her heart (in fact you cant!) And pls dun join the vicious cycle of blaming her parents or siding with ur partner for the sake that she is your partner.
guys, you have an important role in every relationship, esp in a family. you are called to LEAD, not to be led! you have a choice - lead her into fullness of joy or - lead her into the whirlpool of hurt
even though you really do not like her parents or family, humble yourself to earn their respect and trust. the process is full of trials and even tedious.. but it stems down to how much you want your partner to be in REAL JOY, to be free from all the bondages of hurt and resentment..
Remember - what goes around comes around.. one day when ur daughter has a bf, do you want him to earn your repect or you earning his?
3) marriage is a 1-time life-long commitment
those who are married will tell you: it's easier to say 'I do' than to stay married. how true, isn't it? many people are willing to spend 1 yr to plan their big day, but takes 1 day to end it off.
for those guys who are not married - how do you know she is 'the one'?
i know there's no such thing as 'the one' cos pple do change, so do your expectations.. but how can u be sure she is the one who will get you away from all other temptations? 10yrs, 20yrs down the road, will you be able to 'resist' outside seductions becos of her?
dun be eager to marry cos u r of the 'right age' (if so, you are obviously not in the right mentality for marriage) or simply cos u 'feel comfortable' with her. of course, i'm nt asking u not to get married. but do give SERIOUS consideration of the commitment behind the word "marriage". You may 'feel right abt it' now, but how abt feeling right 20yrs,30yrs to come?
then again, do not shun from this responsibility of marriage. You are created with a stronger shoulder to take these responsibilities! (to be crude: why do you think God bless male to be stronger than female? it comes with responsibilities to bear!)
Again, i must remind you - marriage is NOT a try-out. you CANNOT just 'try and see how things will turn out'!! be it Christian values or whatsoever.. do you not know broken marriage is a deep stab into the heart, though people may appear ok with it? Is this the happiness you promise to give in your marriage vow?
.. think about it.. be seriously serious when you say 'let's get married'
p/s: dont worry i'm not recalling my hurt cos it's 'annivesary'.. but cos i've just counselled a friend on this issue.. dont freak out! I'm really ok!!
Monday, December 29, 2008
29 Dec 08 - To Doraemon
hi doraemon
(gosh, this is really weird - writting a letter on my own blog!?!)
offline from this blog, there have been some commotion lately.. so many people have been asking me who are you and i'm left without word to reply.. even my lovable cousin is jumping in now to join the 'fun'.. i know you mentioned it does not matter who you are.. but we would really like to know more of you.. at least as a friend, normal friend?? (trust me, all my friends are curious about you - u just came out from nowhere!)..
how about introducing yourself on my blog? if it's of any comfort to you, at least we'll keep this friendship open online and will always know u as 'doraemon' whom we do not know in person.. i know you have your right to ignore this overwhelming request.. but hey, no harm knowing more friends, right? and spare them (us) the suspense.. i think they are checking my blog these days for you, instead for me.. sob sob.. (talk abt transfer of favour)..
personally, i'd prefer to have a open communication too.. i know you prefer to be invisible angel, but we are living in a real world.. by keeping all these suspense (regardless how caring you are), it kinda plants skepticism into people's minds, esp news of online entrapment is on the rise.. dont get me wrong, i'm not saying you are bad guy. on contrary, i feel u have a caring heart though we have not met..
but being a man, i strongly urge u to take a step of faith to be in the open, to be direct.. let our friendship be 'in the light' as we share each other's lives and experiences for those who read my blog.. that is the purpose of this blog, lol..
Gen 1:3-4
Let there be light, and there was light.. light was good, and He separated the light from the darkness
yours sincerely,
J
(gosh, this is really weird - writting a letter on my own blog!?!)
offline from this blog, there have been some commotion lately.. so many people have been asking me who are you and i'm left without word to reply.. even my lovable cousin is jumping in now to join the 'fun'.. i know you mentioned it does not matter who you are.. but we would really like to know more of you.. at least as a friend, normal friend?? (trust me, all my friends are curious about you - u just came out from nowhere!)..
how about introducing yourself on my blog? if it's of any comfort to you, at least we'll keep this friendship open online and will always know u as 'doraemon' whom we do not know in person.. i know you have your right to ignore this overwhelming request.. but hey, no harm knowing more friends, right? and spare them (us) the suspense.. i think they are checking my blog these days for you, instead for me.. sob sob.. (talk abt transfer of favour)..
personally, i'd prefer to have a open communication too.. i know you prefer to be invisible angel, but we are living in a real world.. by keeping all these suspense (regardless how caring you are), it kinda plants skepticism into people's minds, esp news of online entrapment is on the rise.. dont get me wrong, i'm not saying you are bad guy. on contrary, i feel u have a caring heart though we have not met..
but being a man, i strongly urge u to take a step of faith to be in the open, to be direct.. let our friendship be 'in the light' as we share each other's lives and experiences for those who read my blog.. that is the purpose of this blog, lol..
Gen 1:3-4
Let there be light, and there was light.. light was good, and He separated the light from the darkness
yours sincerely,
J
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