i received an email from Bosco today.. in fact it's abt 10am this morning when he sent to my webmail.. it took me 1min to decide if i shld open it, then i took 3mins staring at his message..before i embark on another 1min to decide if i should delete it. when i finally deleted it, i took more than 5mins for his 2 sentences email.
basically, he was just replying to a mass survey email (those that ask u to share this news with your friends via mass mailing).. so it's not really a direct email to me.. he mentioned he sms me but i didn't reply him(must be the old mobile cos he dun know my new contact) ..he just wants to know how am i now.. ..
my first tot: shld i be affected, be it happy or sad? then next qn: what kind of answer is he expecting?.. .. i know he's still caring enough to ask how am i, but .. how do u expect me to answer that qn?
personally i think it's a dumb qn. considering that super fluent A1 essay he wrote in reply to my old blog (all the effort to structure his thoughts flow), i'm sure he can do better than to ask this 'direct' qn, even though he's really just want to know how am i. .. am i still angry/upset with him? i can clearly tell u - i was but not anymore. it's a burden which i've learnt to let go and let God, thru His stern lesson. .. personal view: if u really want to know how is ur ex-gf doing, then please be smarter. there are alot of other ways to find out, rather than to ask 'just want to know how are you getting?'. if there's a will, there's a way... anyway,how do u expect the answer to be- 'thanks, i'm better now'? 'i still miss you'?? 'how about you n her'???.. if u r asking for the sake of asking, i'd suggest it's better to leave each of u to your life.. cos u might be hurting or giving her false hope.. hence, i decided it's a dumb qn, so i deleted it without replying.
some of u may applaud at my deletion, some may question if i'm too impolite to his kind intentions. well, let me put it this way.. i understand his kind intentions - he really wants to know how am i now after all i was really in a bad shape.. but now that he's on same level as 'normal friends', then i have to see if this kind of 'get-to-know-you' qn interest me. u can say my expectations are high - yes, i do expect guys to take the bold steps to face rejection, for sake of the ladies they really like. it's like a desire - if u really want to know,you'll do everything to find out, even though failure may slams on your face dozens times. clearly, i do not see any effort from this email of good intention to know about my present life.. hence.. it's permanently out of my malbox. perhaps another comfort point/test of faith: if we're meant to be, i believe no matter how many times i slam the door at his face, nothing will stop him from returning.. if God is for us, who can be against us?
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